Stumbled upon some link to Dan Abramov’s blog, and started scrolling it. Found this story of his, My Decade in Review. And while it’s interesting to read something like that, someone’s personal story, some reflections… I realised, I don’t like him. Once again. Every time I interact with the guy virtually, there’s this something that I don’t like. Some vibe.
I’m having a super skill. I can detect a Russian within milliseconds. I just see them. They can pretend they are not, they can never reveal they are Russians, but I just know. I see it. That’s some kind of an x-ray I have.
My mum is a Russian. And before I realised what that truly means, just a few months into the full scale war Russia placed on our heads, me, my wife, our kids, her parents, and millions of others who lived in Ukraine …
by the way, try to find anything about the war in his blog. For Russians, it’s like … the war does not exist. Russians being Russians.
Before the year 2022, my dislike for her was some mysterious thing. It was like a series of events, spanning all my life, that created this state of me not trusting her. Not accepting her as someone close. While it was a series of events indeed, there was no logic behind it. At some point in life, I realised she’s likely to be mental. Like, mentally ill mental. When I saw Russians changing plates in Mariupol from Ukrainian language to Russian, so many pieces connected and suddenly started making sense to me. Including my relationships with my mum.
Once, my dad, when he was still alive, and I was a kid, he said this phrase. They had just another verbal fight they often had, and … oh, wait. Maybe it was me who had a fight with her. She did her best to isolate me from my dad, a decent man, probably thinking he’s the reason of me having fights with her, not her insanity.
So, he said this phrase to me: ‘I’m sorry, son, you’re living with her.’ It was long after I questioned this thing (silently to myself) on my own, which I was doing quite often. In Russia, there’s no other option, it seems. The kids are with the mother, so fuck your boy.
And so, I was 32 when the dots finally made sense to me, upon connecting. She’s a Russian.
Also, my dad, being a Ukrainian, she used to troll my mum with the phrase ‘you can get a woman from a village, but you cannot get a village from her.’ My mum is a villager indeed, and he did mean the literal village. As in Soviet Union, they had this aggressive propaganda projecting people from not cities as some vile barbarians.
Much later in life, some decade ago, I used this violent phrase on my then-girlfriend from Bashkirtostan (occupied by Russia now), that ‘you can get a girl from Russia, but you cannot get a Russian from her.’ That joke happened in Thailand, as a comment for her not trusting locals. (And her associating herself as a Russian too. There are many layers in there.)
My mum is a barbarian. And that’s a miracle I’m not. However, I’m still in the process of unrooting a slave out of me.
Saying all that, I’m having a very well developed skill of recognising a Russian. Probably I could put that to some value for someone. Special forces? I might spot an enemy’s spies by just looking at them, or even their virtual profiles. Ping me, I’m up to the job.
First time I saw Dan Abramov online, it took me a millisecond to say ‘Russian’ and close the link.
My problem with him? None. My problems with Russians. Forget their genocidal barbaric culture, it’s not about that. It’s mostly about them being not worth any attention. Their so-called (genocidal) culture is shit, their so-called (artificial) language is shit, their so-called (failed state) country is shit.
But today I have a problem with Dan Abramov. He’s a Russian. I don’t hate him for being one, but I despise him for being one. Upon writing his ‘my ten years’ personal analysis, he doesn’t mention the context even once. Only the brief statement about his university professor asking a bribe to pay. Yet, pay attention, he’s trying to cover this thing, not even bringing the ‘bribe’ word to the table.
He’s painting himself in a bright light, clearly a skill that nicely fits an American dream. A university dropout. You see, I’m a university dropout too. You see, I’m in computer programming since circa being twelve, or fourteen, or sixteen, it depends which point you choose as a starting one. For myself, I decided it’s not too honestly to slap a ‘I’m programming since twelve on myself’ badge. Yeah, but appearing to be a programming genius sounds cooler, of course. I have no issues with that, however. Employers are dumb fucks after all, right? Why not play by their own rules and fuck them as much as they fuck us, huh?
My issue is with one thing and one thing only: you are not honest. You don’t write the truth for a global audience, Dan. Therefore, it’s pretty much safe to say you’re lying.
My comments to that story would be as follows.
First. Russia has a free higher education. As if that’s the only country that has it. It is not. He does never say that Russian post-Soviet higher education is mostly dogshit. Especially when you study programming. It’s funny that he found a university that, what, gives students free MacBooks? In Russia? Seriously? And not the best one, just by his words some random university that accepted him. Yeah, sounds totally like Russia, my man. Didn’t you know? The life in Russia is just a fairy tale. It’s not like the most prominent achievement for over a century is to actually immigrate from that shit hole of a country.
The university in Russia is just a corruption scheme, with multiple layers. Students pretend that’s a proper higher education, so someone like Dan, being a Russian, could pretend this isn’t different to any other university where you should actually study and not just bribe your way to the diploma.
Then, he says ‘my salary was $18K a year’ and it’s like, I know it’s a small money, but things are cheaper in Russia. Boy, things are just different in Russia. To an outsider, that might even sound like things are better in Russia! You can have your 18K a year, and it’s a decent salary! You can buy iPhones!
Fucking barbarians.
He was invited to work at Facebook in London, many times. Because, remember, he simply missed the first job offer, as if it’s something special. A boy from Russia, why would he even want to move to London? As if United Kingdom any better to great mother Russia!
You ought to imagine some salutes, Red flags, bears with matryoshkas and balalaikas touristic shit, preferably mixed with Bollywood style, just because it’s being even more absurd.
I called my wife to ask whether she’s okay for us to relocate from mother Russia to this pathetic United Kingdom’s capital — by the way the company paying all the expenses, including our dear cat relocation for the royal $5K — and if she’d refuse that (not many woman from Russia would agree to that madness, right), well, I won’t even consider an Interview.
It’s super difficult to read the story further, as when you understand the context, it just smells not right. It’s an interesting personal story, and I love to read more stories like that. But for me personally, it’s just difficult to stand this pretentious bragging about how actually cool I am.
Sometimes success is just a right amount of luck and being in the right place at the right time. That’s why I like to listen to non-success stories more, you can actually learn from those. Because reading ‘I’m cool look how cool I’m and how cool my last ten years we’re cool and how cool cool cool my next decade would be you won’t believe the coolness man’ isn’t just something that is interesting to read. Not worth reading too.
I don’t know Dan Abramov personally, I have never met him (apart from some random very brief online interactions like that), and I understand that this positive way of representing himself is very important for one’s career, so if he got his lucky ticket, he just tries to monetise it for as long as he can. More likely, I’d do the same.
However, I would actually have some respect for him, if I’ve seen him:
- painting Russia for what it is, a shit hole of a country. Does he even aware he might be lying dead somewhere in Ukraine now, if his wife would decline the idea to move to London? Because, of course, he won’t question her sanity, and would just listen to crazy Russian baba, right? Then he would listen to mad Russian general sending him to kill some Ukrainian civilians before he’d die as an animal.
- Saying something about fucking genocidal war his country wages. Saying something about Ukraine’s right to exist and him not supporting all that.
To Russians, politics stands apart from life. They are proud to be apolitical. To them, their personal wellbeing is above everything else. Oftentimes, it’s even above their own kids’. To them ‘it’s not all that well-defined and simple.’ Even when we talk about open genocide. To them, these ideas I highlighted are rather some mad man who got something personally. Or even ‘these pesky Ukrainians hate us for just being Russians!’ Well, that’s actually true, when you learn what being a Russian actually means.
I cannot say whether someone is a Russian spy or not, but I can claim with a confidence, I’d spot a Russian anywhere. I just see them. When they’re not just nationality, but a way of approaching life, themselves, others, it’s getting super easy. Some Russians had never been to Russia, and that makes sense too.