The therapist would pause.
“So … you spend three nights a week together, and Kristin lives in Santa Barbara full-time for three months in the spring,” she would say, trying to paint us the ridiculous picture she was seeing. “That would work fine for some people. Do you think there is something about identifying this as a ‘problem’ that is working for you?”
We scoffed at this. But, years later, I would realize it was the truest thing any therapist has ever said to me. Coloring Vito as ultimately unavailable, all six years that he spent telling me he wanted to be with me forever, worked for me. It made it easy as pie to be 100 percent sure about him. I would learn from many subsequent available men that that is probably how Vito and I lasted six years. But I wouldn’t learn that for a long time. And hence we have this book.
— What I Was Doing While You Were Breeding (Kristin Newman), Loc. 168–74